Articulation of Change?

Stepping out of your comfort zone is a hard thing to do, whether mentally or physically. For this reason alone I was impressed with the show that I watched at ABT last night. On one of my few nights off I decided to take my sister and go peek at the last two pieces on the program Wednesday night. I didn’t know what to expect, as it was my first time watching our premiere ballet of the season “Glow-Stop.” From the minute the curtain went up and the frenzied pace began I was mesmerized by what was happening on stage. It is such a rush getting to watch your friends dance as they do in this piece, exhibiting a sense of abandon rarely seen in classical ballet. I won’t go into too much detail but I was very pleasantly surprised with what I saw last night especially since it was so far out of the “comfort zone” that can be established with various forms of movement.

Why is it so difficult to initiate change? My dad wrote me an incredible email the other day concerning this issue and I will never be able to put it as eloquently as he did but I’ll try. Fear is such a stifling thing because it brings up the ideas of success and failure. These are polar opposites, but both representing change, which takes initiative. I was reminded of this when watching “Glow-Stop” last night; I was reminded of this in class just this morning. Resistance to change is a draining and useless thing but something that is also unavoidable. It is getting over this resistance, whether to a new movement pattern or new mental pattern, that you allow yourself to become freer. You can only resist so long before you have to give in. Easier said than done, right?

It sounds obvious to say that being scared is a natural thing. I find with myself that being scared is often what I am scared of, a bit of a mind twister. When suddenly I am not aware of who I am as these feelings come into my head I retract and try to overanalyze. Like with dance, your mind works in similar ways, things will work easier when you relax into the movement of your mind and body. Like with “Glow-Stop” last night, success CAN be found when stepping into uncomfortable territory. Here I go again with one of my “YOU” speeches directed at myself. It’s just one of those days.

Sometimes the life lessons that we learn from such a young age (i.e. “focus on the positive”) seem impossible to adhere to. The more that I expand myself and my mindset, the larger the umbrella known as my “comfort zone” will become. I am learning that I am comfortable with some things I had not thought before, and uncomfortable with other things I used to love (crappy Hollywood movies i.e. Marie Craponiette.) This blog is all over the place today as my brain is working through new ideas; I feel about as articulate as President Bush.

Comments

[carson]

i love you. you are great....and FAR more articulate than good ol' george, even on a "bad" day.

[tania]

Oh Bush-bashing. A million extra points for working that in. But interesting I've been thinking about all this stuff too recently, in relation to art. I have an amazing poetry prof. who has been kicking my ass because I tend to sensor the things about my point-of-view that are "messy" out of my work, due, of course, to fear. Forcing yourself to leave your comfort zone as an artist, and to really make the art personal, is terrifying because you are basically parading your imperfections and weaknesses and making yourself completely vulnerable, and artistic rejection or failure thus begins to feel like personal rejection. But no one with any sense (including yourself) will find the art compelling if you don't do this; your art will be completely stagnant and saccharin. There's nothing worse than finding your own art boring.

Enough philosophizing on someone else's blog for me. Away with the soapbox. Back to the midterms.

[Jennifer]

change is good...i learned how to ice skate on a whim at age 25.

although now that I think about it, I like to see ABT dance classical full length ballets...but that's just me being in my comfort zone, since I know that's what I like :)

[tonya]

Brilliantly said, Tania! Wow!

I liked Glow-Stop too because it was different and my favorite art generally is art that pushes the boundaries and makes me think. I really like your posts where you talk about the artistic process and your struggle to find your voice and your place in the world as an artist, because, like Tania, as someone who's trying to start a writing career, I can relate. Keep it up :)

[7th Wave]

A fun thing to do: talk to Fear. Invite him in to eat at your table. Embrace him. What you resists persists.