18 last week. 16 this week. Things are getting serious...a word that the jidges will have a hard time spelling if they are in the same drug induced stupor as last week. The blog might be all rainbows and lollipops this week with the elimination of "street dancer" Susy Mixy Hair; will there be a new target for my harping love? And let's have a moment to mourn the premature elimination of Marquis! Okay...stop crying. I said a moment. It's over. Time to watch "So You Think You Can What What!?"
8:00- Cat Deeley is sporting a white lace outfit tonight. Last week she was the angel of death in a full black ensemble, this week she is the angel of doilies...in one giant doily.
8:03- During the introductions Gev pulls out some popper tricks that almost dislocate his shoulders...and I mean that in the coolest way. Thayne pulls out a smile that almost dislocates his face...and I mean that. Period.
8:04- Adam Shankman of "Hairspray" fame is on the panel tonight. Get ready for rainbows shooting out of his fingertips. Mary Murphy apparently got a hold of a bedazzler, and a pattern book for your grandma's sweater...and possibly some crack.
8:06- They acknowledge Cyd Charisse's passing. Nigel claims to have danced with her, and all of America is heard saying, "When?!"
8:11- Twitch and Kherrington (Twitchington) are up first with a hip-hop routine by Tabitha and Napoleon Beatrix and Geronimo! The theme of the interview packages this week is the dancers...talking about each other? LAME. Same as last week.
8:12- Kherrington (and her golden sunshine hair) is glowing tonight. The question on everyone's mind: Will she wear shoes?! Seriously, what's up with her being barefoot ALL the time. Hip-Hop barefoot would just seem weird. But they are doing a "prison break" number, so maybe she'll try to make it her "character" escaping from prison after a shower?
8:13- She's got shoes on today!! And the angels rejoiced! They pop up from the side of the stage, as if hopping over a wall escaping prison. The next thirty seconds of the choreography include some awkward poses before breaking into a humorous routine . Twitch is giving it tonight, full-blown attitude. Kherrington is smiling a bit too much, but peppering it with moments of appropriate style. She seems to be losing steam toward the end of the number. Overall the choreography had clever moments incorporating the escape theme.
8:16- Mary's fake eyelashes tonight are as long and distracting as her screams. She leans over to kiss Adam Shankman in the pass off during the critiques, but is still laughing, therefore he kisses her teeth. Hot.
8:24- Rachel Bilson Courtney G. and Gev are up next. Methinks that Mary will hate the routine based purely on the fact that Courtney has ten times as many sparkles on her blue floor-length gown. They are doing Rumba with Tony Meridith and Melanie LaPatin (who has a last name tonight!). Can we just take a moment to remember how awesome it was when she stepped in last year and rocked that routine with Pasha?! Yet again they spend the interview package talking about how much Gev likes Courtney. Poor guy.
8:27- They start with a shoulder sit leading to sliding down his extended leg to the floor. It then becomes clear that her dress basically only has an inch of fabric, and leaves one side of her body uncovered. The music is like rumba porn music. Their connection is nice tonight, but Gev seems to have a hard time (no pun intended) with the fluidity of his upper body. It ends with them on the floor with Courtney basically pushing his face away. Poor guy.
8:28- "I am very, VERY happy with that routine," says Nigel. This is little Nigel speaking, of course. I feel that that is an appropriate comment, seeing as the routine was borderline sex. He then spends a minute praising the wardrobe department for their dress choice. I'm surprised his eyes don't pop out of his head like Roger Rabbit.
8:39- Chris and Comfort are up next. Comfort’s Southern charm is infectious. They are doing a Tyce Diorio Jazz routine that is “raw, grounded, and earthy.” In other words: Mia Michaels.
8:42- The music has a hard rock pulsing sound to it (Marilyn Manson). They are in Tarzan-ish costumes and rolling each other around on the floor. Comfort is using her ability to rock the isolations to her advantage tonight. But the choreography seems very even, and only exciting because of the power behind the music, which isn’t met in the choreography. I feel that there is a self-consciousness to Chris' performance that is detrimental in a piece like this that requires the dancers to literally devour the stage.
8:45- The jidges put most of the responsibility on the dancers, when I feel that the choreography is equally to blame on this one.
8:48- Mary has a bracelet on that condenses all of the jewels on her blouse to her wrist. Is this like Elizabeth Taylor's cat toy?
8:51- Jessicar (as Cat says) and Will are up next. Apparently Jessica's mom calls her Ariel because she used to have red hair. I bet in reality it's because she used to thrust her hips on every rock she came in contact with.
8:53- They are doing a Doriana Sanchez Disco routine. Are they going to charge the stage?
8:54- No charging the stage, but there is some disco ball action going on. Will has a bounciness to his step that pulls the attention to him in a great way. Not sure if it is "correct" disco technique, but it has me smiling.
8:56- They go into a series of lifts that basically resemble Will smashing a disco ball into the floor repeatedly. Apparently this is called a "death fall," and it was a bit literal tonight.
8:57- Contrary to popular belief, Mary is still sitting at the jidging table. I thought for a moment she was spinning on the ceiling. Then again, we didn't hear shrieking or see any vomit pouring from the heavens from the speed at which she would have to be turning. She says that Jessica "stepped up to the plate." More like charged the plate like a baseball player. It's with praise like this that I become wary of the obvious favoritism the show pulls. She seems to have lost all energy in the middle of the routine, and is still receiving this praise?
8:58- Dorianna Sanchez is the director of Cher's new show in Vegas. Are we positive that she isn't actually Cher?
9:05- Kourtni and Matt are up next. Does she have a new lip piercing? Or did Mary just smother her with her sweater? Why the hell do they keep showcasing these bizarre interviews with Matt. He's wearing a stripped ninja mask this week and it only shows his mouth and eyes. The producers want him GONE.
9:06- They got contemporary this week, which is both of their strong area. Sonya Tayeh is a new guest choreographer for the night. She looks a bit like a character from "Streets of Rage," remember that AMAZING game for Sega? She is rocking a butt-length mohawk like no one's business.
9:08- The number is about two comic book characters chasing each other. Using "Hot Chip" for music, always a good choice. Dressed in enough different patterns to fill a season of "Project Runway." They both have such gorgeous extension, and are being given ample opportunities to throw their legs in the air. Overall WAY too much kicking, but a fun routine that gives them both a chance to let loose.
9:11- Nigel says he doesn't think the public will understand it as much as a "romantic Mia Michael's" routine. This routine isn't rocket science. It's just not a contemporary routine about flawed love.
9:12- Mary starts shrieking at one point during her critique, and flinging her wrist in front of her face as she talks about "sweeping." Ummm..can we say excuse for her to wave something shiny in front of her face? "Mary like!"
9:13-"Dude, the ninja mask thing, just weird," says Shankman. By weird he means, "Please wear it over to my apartment tonight."
9:18- Chelsea and Thayne are up next doing Heather Smith's quick step. During the interview it is revealed that Chelsea is a "flower thief." That sounds like some demented Care Bear.
9:20- Chelsea is also sporting a disco ball outfit tonight, and looks STUNNING. (She is on Mary's Hit list.) Dancing to "Can't Hurry Love," which while a decent effort to fit quick step to something contemporary is just distractingly anachronistic. Despite Chelsea's charm, there is an overwhelming feeling that they know how ludicrous the routine looks. Some nice traveling across the floor, but sloppy footwork. She throws herself into a beautiful final dip, where she looks radiant.
9:23- Wouldn't it be amazing if Mary just crept up on stage and stole Chelsea's sparkly earings? She could be like some creepy sparkle hogging Golum of the dance world. "My precious..."
9:25- During the critique, Mary "removes Chelsea from the hot tamale train." And rambles on about how she is basically dangling Thayne off the back while cackling like a madwoman as his feet scrape on the track. It becomes strange when she uses this whole "train" analogy as if it actually exists.
9:33- Chelsea and Mark (one of my favorite guys) are up next doing a Beatrix and Geronimo routine. It is revealed that Mark has Captain Hook pinkies. WHAAAAT?
9:34- The story is about a workaholic and the woman who wants to beat him with his briefcase because of it. They are doing it to Leona Lewis' "Bleeding Love," which, despite being a BIT five months ago, is fantastic.
9:35- He's in a suit and she is in some ill-fitting tutu leotard. The choreography is reminiscent of the Joshua and Katee routine from week one. It has such nice musicality and emotion to it. They manage to pull hip-hop out of what we expect from it, both by placing him in a suit, and by mixing it with a more "lyrical" storyline. Beatrix and Geronimo ROCK. Best routine of the night.
9:37- Nigel says that Mark might be a lucky "traveling salesman." Mary starts cackling because she remembers the traveling jewel salesman who got real lucky with her. She starts taking it to some personal level about leaving loved ones behind. Everyone is confused. Just stare at her bling.
9:40- Shankman gets up and screams "YEAH! That's what I'm talking about." I start screaming uncontrollably for no apparent reason. Oh, wait. The reason is apparent: it's him.
9:46- The number one couple of the past two weeks, Katee and Joshua, are the final pairing of the night. Joshua is adorable, always exuding such love. They will be doing a Samba routine by Tony Meridith and Melanie LaPatin. They are making it look like Joshua has no clue what he is doing during the rehearsal footage. Let's hope this means he kills it.
9:50- Apparently the half dress is the style of choice tonight. She has enough feathers that she COULD be a Dr. Seuss character. And enough sex appeal that she could switch me to the other team. Nice levels to their movement. Sexiest dance of the night by far...and not uncomfortable like Gev and Courtney's. In addition to both looking beautiful, they trust in the movement and don't push too much.
9:52- Nigel makes Joshua's dad stand up and show off his butt, to see if Joshua got his from his "daddy." Nice to know that he doesn't discriminate when perving on the dancers.
9:54- Mary is overwhelmed at the sexiness and is fanning herself with her hands. After gathering her thoughts she gives them "hot tamale" credit, and ALMOST impales herself on the microphone. Then she catches sight of her blouse and realizes it's way too soon to leave this earth.
Overall an underwhelming night redeemed by two great performances:
1. Katee and Joshua
2. Mark and Chelsea
And one enjoyable performance:
3. Twitchington
Who's going home tomorrow?
Jessica and Chris.
BE SURE TO CHECK OUT THE FANTASTIC BLOGGING SYTYCD DURING THE WEEK! IT'S THE MOST COMPREHENSIVE GUIDE TO THE SHOW!!!!
So glad I found your blog - hysterical. Now I look for forward to it as much as the show. When do we start dissing the other "dance" shows?
Posted by: Claire | June 26, 2008 at 02:21 PM
I just stumbled on your blog recently and ABSOLUTELY love it! You're so hilarious and I totally agree with almost everything you say! It's so nice to read a trained dancer's point of view. =) I definitely agree with your top couples--Katee and Joshua is my favorite couple and probably the best dancers so far, yet I really loved Mark and Chelsea's routine. I definitely look forward to your blogs as much as the show, keep it up! =)
Posted by: Elizabeth | June 26, 2008 at 02:42 PM
I loved the last two numbers and Twitchingtons and Kourtni and Matts. Those half dresses were super scandolous! I can't get over how little was holding those things together!
I was super surprised that Chelsea went home. Bummers. But it was definately Chris' time.
Posted by: Natalie D. | June 27, 2008 at 08:16 AM